What to expect in New Nepal?

Now that Nepal has officially become New Nepal (don’t you know who the New Prime Minister is?), we are sure some things will change for good (still questioning the logic of the word…) now.

But what would it be that would change and what would remain the same. Yours truly was just told yesterday (by someone claiming to be a friend), “All good things will change, and all things will remain good.”

Big talks those, for these words are difficult to fathom. The only things that I could manage to understand in those were the complicated use of the words. No good that…

Anyways, we only pray that some things from good ‘ol Nepal would remain the way they’ve always been. Like, smelly rivers in the capital; opportunity to watch the latest blockbuster while complaining during Maitighar Traffic jam; Short-term Nepali festivals called bandh, chakka jam etc.; and the people who love to interrupt you no matter what.

The chances are Nuclear-free world could be a reality before these things actually change in Nepal. But some things that we would love to see changing, and realistically pray that would change, in the days (or hours?) to come would be:

1. Security to those-who-matter: Maoist combatants providing security to security chiefs – This idea perhaps needs to be patented. For this could have come from a genius head (so, not staking claim to such an idea at all…). If the combatants are good enough to secure the new PM (that too, the Fierce One), of course, those Generals, IGs and similarly attired personalities would be better off under their cover. Moreover, it does not let them deviate from what we term as the ‘People’s mandate’.

2. Nationalization of intellectual property: So much has been talked about the nationalization of property. It’s time for a shift, and Nepal is yearning for a quantum shift now. With too many intellectual property heads confined to such small space in the capital, we need to do something about it. We are looking forward to nationalize it. The rationale here is – like every other organization that is national, these too do not work. With so many heads nationalized, it’s definitely going to be easier to get rid of them too (not an original idea though…). One question needs to be answered though, if all the nationalized intellectual property is thrown into Bagmati, would the river be called Brain Drain?

3. Parking lots on the roads: This is certainly the Oscar winner, among all the ideas that have been thrown to yours truly lately (he’s already under a pile and barely able to type – This is secretary using the fingers for him). Something that we’d love to see in New Nepal is, parking spaces on the roads. Take Maitighar to Tinkune stretch for example. Just imagine how many vehicles can be parked on the stretch. With protests at Maitighar and Constituent Assembly at Baneshwor, haven’t the roads already been reduced to slow moving parking lot? Dare to disagree, if you can. Moreover, this is another way to increase the royal, err… Maoist, oops… government revenue. Keep on adding more vehicles on the road Mister, we gonna get you down by levying parking fees. Wotta way to employ those ‘league goons’, err… league leaders while extorting, err… enforcing fees. Ain’t it a brilliant idea comrade (pronounced come-raid)?

We’ll let the list grow fat in days to come.
And before it gets too late, news to share:

Venezuela’s national assembly took action against kidnapping and passed a law that addressed abduction. Up to this point the country hasn’t had a specific law that deals with kidnapping. Now, if someone is convicted of kidnapping they could face up to 30 years in jail. Even thought kidnapping rates are down this year, the government felt a law was needed to address gorilla warfare abductions that have plagued the country.

We can have our assembly formulate a law supporting kidnapping. Any takers??? Something we can add to make it our very own idea is – All kidnapping which do not show political cause behind it and asks for no ransom be banned. Unless, how would the state and business function?

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